Do You Like My Hat?

 

Hi.

Yes.

Thanks for your interest.

No problem, let me tell you all about it.

It’s a proven methodology over many decades that in the long-run produces double-digit annual average returns without the drawdowns of buy and hold.

Well yes it might sound very simple, that’s part of its appeal, and I know people think if it’s that simple it can’t be effective or everyone would be doing it, but it’s not easy I can assure you.

hat1

 

 

Hi.

Yes.

Thanks for your interest.

Well we try to zig when the market zags, yes that does sound interesting doesn’t it? We’ve just hired an analyst from Wegotawaywithit Partners and he’s ranked number one at what he does, in fact he’s the only one that does what he does, that’s what makes him so special. We think it’s really important to minimize investor losses so we try to anticipate when the market will rise or fall. Last year was a surprise but we’re confident next year will be good.

hat2

 

 

Hi.

Yes.

Thanks for your interest.

Yes, that’s right, we use very very very, that’s three verys, complex mathematical models to take advantage of arbitrage or convergence trades in government bonds and just about anything else we can cast our eye over, and then we leverage it, by whatever amount won’t attract attention. Charts? LOL. Good God no. We also have an outstanding equity department that looks at EBITDA, P/E’s, PEG ratios, they’ve even come up with a couple of new acronyms no-one else knows about yet. Who? Oh, yes, he’s on the board. It’s hard to get on our board unless you’ve won a Nobel Prize. Do you speak Greek? No? Excellent. Well we’re a major supplier of Vega, no, it’s not a restaurant, it’s in demand by companies seeking to essentially insure equities against future declines. It measures sensitivity to volatility, we’re always looking at that, as well as Gamma, Vanna, and Vomma. Oh, and Velma, she’s the receptionist, don’t want to forget her.

So what do you think? Wonderful.

Thank you so much. We’ll be in touch.

hat3

 

Complexity sells.  Simplicity pays.